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Friday, April 19, 2013

Screw it, I'm distracted.

Hey guys.

Dead, I'm totally lifeless now. I'm not sure what's wrong with my body, but whenever I'm tired, I think the most. Which is right now.

I think I am distancing myself away from others right now. Not sure why, but maybe because I feel inferior to them, or I just dun wanna annoy their private life. This shit is just freaking torturing la. It's only the 1st week and I'm alr having problems. FML.

First, I want friends, you know. Like, someone I can really interact and relate to. Someone of the opposite gender would be good actually, based on experience. But wtf, how do I find someone like this now? It's poly, and I have to do all the self-intro shit all over again, yeah. I know I rant on this before. But seriously, I'm uber lazy and tired. The timetable is torturing enough and now I still have to spend time interacting just to know ppl better. #sianttm

And, I'm not sure why. After the holidays, after all the isolation, I lost all my sense of humour. I become a really boring person, and maybe that's 1 reason why ppl dun approach me. Another reason would be obviously, LOOKS. #screwthat. That's what I hate about poly sometimes. No looks, no friends. It's not totally dun have la, but it's damn hard to find one.

My coursemates all have close friends or maybe their bf/gf to turn to after school. But wts, I dun even know where to go. That's when I feel like a total loser in life. No direction. If my friends are gone, means my fun ends too. THAT TOTALLY SUCKS.

Omg, I'm so tired and frustrated right now. I feel like just quitting life, I'm sick of all those shit. Why did God put me in this situation? I'm throwing the towel.

I feel like an crushed empty shell, TOTALLY BROKEN.


Masquerade-ing.